21 Ways to Sneak Alcohol During the Holidays
The holidays offer the perfect opportunity to get together with your family, but you might not always be feeling the holiday cheer when dealing with your tío’s conservative rants or being constantly pestered by your nieces and nephews. We all know how hectic latino family gatherings can be, and you may want to turn to alcohol to make you merrier. However, not everyone wants to drink in plain sight during a holiday gathering, especially in more conservative families, so we put together this list of stealthy ways that you can sneak alcohol during the holidays.
1. Cut out a soda can sleeve to cover your beer.
You can either DIY a can cover by cutting up an empty bottle or buy a pre-made cover that’s made just for this purpose. Depending on the size of your drink, this is a foolproof way to hide your booze. Just make sure you hide your stash so no unassuming relatives accidentally drink it.
2. Use tampon flasks.
While the idea of drinking out of a tampon even if it’s fake may seem unappetizing, nobody will suspect a thing. Just excuse yourself to the restroom, grab your “tampon”, and take a swig.
3. Hide it in a Starbucks cup.
Did you know that you can fit a whole bottle of wine in a Starbucks “Trenta” cup? Red wine looks close enough to coffee, and the holidays are the perfect excuse to grab yourself a cup of joe. If you’re looking for something even more discreet, use a styrofoam or paper coffee cup and chug away.
4. Make alcohol-infused gummy bears.
Buy a pack of gummy bears and put them into a ziplock bag, then fill the bag with vodka and let it sit in the fridge for a few hours. The gummy bears will soak up most of the alcohol. This trick will make your family think you’re just a candy addict, but be careful if there are kids around – they might want to try some of your boozy gummies. If this inevitably happens, you can use the excuse that you’re trying to prevent the childhood obesity crisis.
5. Get a phone flask.
Everyone’s on their phones these days and a phone-shaped flask is a perfect way to sneak booze around your family. Just pretend you’re texting someone and pour some liquor into your glass.
6. Use a garter belt flask holder.
If you’re a lady, chances are you’ll be wearing more formal attire involving skirts or dresses during the holidays. A garter belt flask makes it easy to lift your skirt and take a swig when you get a moment alone.
7. Hide alcohol in a gift bag.
This will only work during an event involving presents, but it’s a foolproof way to get tipsy during Christmastime. Put a bottle of your favorite booze in a gift bag and surround it with tissue paper. You can address the gift to yourself so nobody else will open it. Whenever you find yourself near the gift table, you can grab a quick swig and hide it again.
8. Use a hairbrush flask.
When it’s time for a family holiday photo, you can use your hairbrush to grab a quick drink. Excuse yourself to the bathroom to “brush your hair” to look picture-perfect, and take a swig. Nobody will think twice about your need to look good.
9. Use a flask scarf.
There is no better time to wear a scarf than during the holidays. With a flask scarf, you can keep warm and secretly sip your favorite adult beverage.
10. Use a lipstick flask.
If you wear lipstick, the lipstick flask is the perfect way to hide your booze. Just step away for a touch-up before a family photo and drink. This can also work for any other type of makeup. If you’re really dedicated, you can empty a makeup bottle, clean it well, and fill it with your favorite booze.
11. Hide alcohol behind the Christmas tree.
One of the best things about Christmas trees is how easily they can conceal things – and you, when you’re looking for a private place to take a swig. Before a family gathering begins, stash away your booze behind the tree. When it’s time to take a drink, you just say that you’re taking a look at the ornaments.
12. Use a collapsible booze bag.
Booze bags are small bag-like flasks that can hold just about any type of beverage. You can store them almost anywhere to allow for quick access to your favorite drink when you need a little holiday pick-me-up.
13. Or just go for a classic hip flask.
Nothing beats tradition, especially during the holidays. Go old school and bring a hip flask to your holiday gatherings. You can discretely take a swig whenever you manage to get a moment of solitude.
14. Use a flask tie.
If you like to dress up for the holidays and are a fan of ties, you can buy a flask tie to secretly get tipsy during your family gatherings. Your outfit might look a little weird, but who cares when you’re drunk?
15. Use a fake beer belly.
Chances are, you’ll be seeing relatives you haven’t seen in a while during the holidays. Use this opportunity to claim that you’ve gained weight in recent months by slapping on a beer belly flask under your favorite holiday sweater.
16. Use a flask wallet.
This is sure to be discreet. Just slip your “wallet” in your back pocket and nobody will suspect a thing.
17. Hide alcohol in your spare film cases.
If you’re the family’s designated photographer, you likely have some spare film cases lying around. This offers the perfect chance to smuggle some booze into your holiday gatherings.
18. Opt for a wine rack.
The wine rack is a sports bra that can discretely hold your favorite adult beverage. Your relatives probably won’t notice that you’ve gained a cup size.
19. Bring a smuggle mug.
Tell your family you want to lose weight for the new year and you’re trying out a special weight loss drink. That will explain away your reluctance to drink soft beverages and nobody will want to touch your special drink – more liquor for you!
20. Stash away airplane bottles.
There are endless possibilities to where you can hide an airplane-sized alcohol bottle. Turn it upside down and stuff it in your sock, stash some in your pockets, or hide them near your junk. When you get creative, there’s no limit to what you can do with these.
21. Nothing beats pregaming.
If all else fails, there’s no easier way to secretly get buzzed at a holiday gathering than to drink beforehand. Nobody will suspect a thing – just stay safe and enjoy!
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