It seems that spicy foods are everywhere these days. Every brand out there is releasing some version of their original product but in ‘flamin hot’ form, there’s an abundance of YouTube videos of people eating insanely spicy foods as if it were some sort of competition, restaurants have ‘eat it and it’s free’ contests for spicy options.

The world is obsessed with spicy food right now.

But let’s be real. Many Latino foods were the OG spicy. Many Latino chefs and even our tías and abuelas have been experimenting with some seriously spicy foods for many many years.

But now that it’s gone mainstream, the LA Times recently conducted a not so official study into which snacks are the spiciest and the results have proven to be pretty controversial.

One writer at the L.A. Times decided to sample every spicy branded snack and share his findings with the world.

In the article, he says that he’s sampled every spicy snack known to mankind (not exactly), except for the ones that he couldn’t find, that he deemed unworthy, or both.

He also calls out the haters who say all the Flamin’ Hot and spicy snacks taste the same, saying that’s simply not true. He notes the subtle differences based on combination of heat vs. flavor.

So what are his findings?

According to this LA Times Food writer, his favorite spicy snack is the Doritos Flamin’ Hot Nacho. They’re the perfect mix of cheesy and spicy and come packed with a pretty hefty kick of spice.

Next came the Flamin’ Hot Cheetos Puffs which he says are packed with spicy flavor, sometimes almost too much so. The only con he had to say about these is about the texture – sometimes too much can build up in your back teeth leaving you feeling sick.

Coming in at third place is Pop Fuego Popcorn. He says the level of MSG is at a 12 and that the flavor sensation is something like being on a rollercoaster. Pop Fuego kernels are not particularly heat-heavy but they’re almost hyperbolically tangy and acidic.

The Top 3 options weren’t exactly controversial picks but the rest of the results seemed to be pretty polarizing on social media.

I mean who would ever put Takis Fuego and Doritos Dinamita in a tie for 5th place?!? Or Zapp’s Spicy Cajun Crawtators ahead of Doritos Tapatío? That’s just straight up madness.

And how are the OG Flamin’ Hot Cheetos not number one?

And it’s clear that the classic battle between Hot Cheetos and Takis rages on.

But like in all honesty, will it ever go away? I hope not.

But some on Twitter were totally not having any of it.

I mean ranking #12 out of 30 isn’t too bad. But apparently still wasn’t good enough for this Flamin’ Hot Cheetos con Limon super fan…

In his write up, Lucas Peterson said these would take a back seat to Takis any day.

I mean this Twitter user was so upset they’re apparently canceling their subscription to the LA Times.

Now that’s some serious feelings there.

But, to be fair, the LA Times placed Andy Capp’s Hot Fires at #27 (out of 30) and said they had an unpleasant spice mixture that tasted like powered tomato. That’s not great.

One Doritos super fan took to Twitter to notify the LA Times of a possible typo in their report.

The LA Times actually tweeted back saying: “These are pretty good and am honestly impressed how much these taste like Tapatío, they’re just not the best *spicy* snack.

Be careful, those are fighting words.

Also, just this tweet, because I’m pretty sure all of us were thinking it.

Because the panza is a real thing.

H/T: The Official Spicy Snack Power Rankings

Latinos own the dulce game. We have a sweet tooth like no other and it shows. Yes, I’m bragging how many ways we can make tamarindo taste like fruit of the gods.

This isn’t your average list of peanut butter cups and Milky Ways. These are candies that we eat all year round at our work desks, but that we once used to beg strangers house to house for. If you’re reading this, you’re on the other side, and it’s time for you to show up for those niños knocking on your door. Here’s that good good.

You know you hit the jackpot when you walk up to this house.

CREDIT: @kayyymo_ / Twitter

No question you’re excited about the Midnight Milky Ways and Nerds, but you already know that your mom is going to make you pick out all those midnights and Reese’s cups for herself. It’s how you pay her back for making you that costume.

This candy, though, you ration for months to come.

The mother of all candies: Pelon Pelo Rico

CREDIT: @theFlama / Twitter

It’s literally the candy that keeps on giving. You can (kinda) stop eating it and save it for later. Getting one of these is like getting 4 pieces of candy.

Chupa Chups are the most pedestrian.

CREDIT: Untitled. Digital Image. ChupaChupsUniverse. 28 September 2018.

I’m just telling it like it is. Every Latino house will have a bowl of Chupa Chups, but that won’t stop you from taking a handful every time.

Mazapan De La Rosa is like the eucharist.

CREDIT: @CristinaPerez11 / Twitter

It’s so sacred, it’s the most delicate candy anyone in the world could receive. If, by the end of the night, it was still intact, you could feel God’s presence. Be the person that gives out de la Rosa.

The best part of Paletas Payasos was whether he had a face.

CREDIT: @MitzySsal / Twitter

Half the time, his smile was where his unibrow should be and you just had to ask, “Are they even trying?” And then you ate the one of a kind chocolate lollipop and the sugar rush put your mouth where your unibrow should be.

Alfajores were the rare breed you never forgot.

CREDIT: @shadowsofshield / Twitter

Caramel stuffed galletas dipped in chocolate? You never forgot the family that gave those out and you always curtsied whenever you saw los reyes again.

We never noticed Duvalín was “bisabor.”

CREDIT: @moonbunny514 / Twitter

It’s the Spanglish queero in me that is shipping this candy in a whole new way. It’s literally just a container of Neapolitan frosting that doesn’t need to be refrigerated.

Pulparindo was the Mexi fruit roll up of our generation.

CREDIT: @kittyvoncupcake / Twitter

The only fruit we eat is tamarindo. These days, they’re even making goth pulparindo. Your entire neighborhood reputation is riding on this. Choose wisely.

Vero Elotes just tickled your childhood imagination.

CREDIT: @amy_moreng / Twitter

It low key burned your mouth to eat so much tamarindo in one night, but it felt like health to eat candy in the shape of corn, so your mom just let you have at it.

Gansito’s were a luxury treat.

CREDIT: Untitled. Digital Image. MarinelaUSA. 28 September 2018.

These kids will grow up to become doctors and lawyers. Give them Gansitos and they’ll remember you for life, tu sabes? ; )

Leave it to Latinos to improve caramel candies with goats milk.

CREDIT: @lgn0rance / Twitter

Paletón de Cajeta Quemada are better than your abuelita’s toffees because of that lil goat right there. The cajeta makes it kid-friendly.

You always walked away with ~147 Tomy’s at the end of the night.

CREDIT: @cecilindro / Twitter

There are two kinds of people in this world. People who ate Tomy’s like popcorn or hoarded them Halloween night to use them as a key barter tool the next day at school.

The real mischievous neighbors put out Rockaleta “Diablo.”

CREDIT: @ashleyb8255 / Twitter

The chile will for real burn the roof of your mouth off. You pretty much only indulge in this candy when times are spooky and you want to try yourself.

Four layers of tamarind with a major chili flavored gum ball in the center is not for the faint of heart. Someone has to be the person that leaves these out for parents to monitor.

Vero Mangos will give you something sweet.

CREDIT: @vero.mango / Instagram

Instead of a fireball at the center of all the tamarind, you get that sweet, chewy mango. What’s it going to be? Neighborhood sweetheart or diablo?

Rebanaditas are for summer children.

CREDIT: @TrappM0neyBenny / Twitter

Literally it’s a vero mango but with a watermelon candy at the center. We’re basically just trained since children to never need our teeth.

Long Boys Coconut are just straight sugar tootsie rolls.

CREDIT: @Fleurdelis318 / Twitter

They’re probably not even Latino, but we’ve just adopted them as our own. Literally nobody else gives these out unless you live in a viejo only neighborhood. Context is crucial when deciding how to candy rep on Halloween night.

The most Mexi candy of all: Bandera de Coco

CREDIT: Untitled. Digital Image. Mexican Grocer. 28 September 2018.

You are reppin’ in a major way if you give out these shredded coconut and sugar candy. The Latino neighbors won’t even care that their kids will never come out of a sugar high.

You win the night if you give out Doña Pepa.

CREDIT: @VidaWithC / Twitter

If you even find Doña Pepa, please @ me. I haven’t had this chocolate bar in years and will personally shake your hand and steal your stash if you tell me.

If you’re in it to win over the parents, here’s a thought:

CREDIT: @teampuertoricoo / Twitter

The kids are going to roll their eyes every time they pass your house, but you’ll have instant family by Goya blood. This is political right here.

Just don’t be this person:

CREDIT: @AudreyPuente / Twitter

I mean, I applaud this person, truly. But rep that Latino sweet tooth like you were bred to.

READ: You Can’t Make It through this List of Mexican Candy Without Making Your Mouth Water

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