comedy

Watch Romeo Santos, Daddy Yankee And Nicky Jam Be The Ultimate Corny Creeps In ‘Bella y Sensual’

Credit: RomeoSantosVEVO/ YouTube

Romeo Santos, Daddy Yankee and Nicky Jam just dropped a music video for their new song “Bella y Sensual” that pulls a page out of the “How to be a New York papi-chulo” handbook.

The trio shows us a typical night out for guys in The Big Apple, and it’s got all the trappings of the reggatonero life, giving us a how-to guide on being the corniest, rico suave dude on the planet.

First, stand around a rooftop pool with your boys, a chilly fall breeze filling the air, as women, for some reason, walk by in bikinis, looking cold as hell. Like, how come none of these dude offer her a jacket?

Next, make sure to dress up in the most ridiculous outfit you can find. If you’re like Romeo, this includes a leopard print shirt, gaudy gold sneakers and, of course, a fedora.

Leave the frozen pool area to go uptown to hang out in front of a subway station at 9:30 p.m for what appears to be an unlicensed street party. As you pull in your cars “The Fast and The Furious” style, high beams illuminating the street party, make sure to catcall any woman walking by. Remember to change your outfit from a fedora to a varsity jacket with a cape, because you’re obviously out here trying to save the ladies from enjoying a night out with their friends in peace.

After trying to convince a girl to give you the time of day, decide to leave her alone only when the police show up to break up your illegal street rager.

Finally, at 1 a.m., get to the club. Don’t forget to flirt with the bottle girls. They love that, and really want to hear all the illuminating things you have to scream in their ears over the music.

Then at 5 a.m., make your way to the neighborhood diner for some grub. Make sure to eat something hearty to sober up after all that free bottle service your flirting got you. Even after hours and hours of dancing and sweating, everyone at the diner is still looking impeccable, so remember to stay sharp, playa. Flirt with everyone trying to enjoy their late dinner/early breakfast. Who doesn’t want to be chatted up over eggs and the early signs of a hangover?

Just before calling it a night, make sure to holler at the same girl your friends tried to get at. Taking no for an answer, even though it’s the right thing to do, isn’t for you. You’re a macho stereotype. Get out of here with that logical stuff. Also, women love your arrogant pick up lines. Don’t worry about her friends who want to leave, they won’t think you’re being inconsiderate at all.

And after all of that, be sure to creepily offer her a ride. Attempt to convince her by calling her “baby” and “mamacita.”

Be sure to watch her drive away, and shout things at her when she’s still within earshot. Getting away from you as quickly as humanly possible is a clear sign that she’s into at least one of you.

Then, high five your homies for a successful night out on the town. And finally, make sure to be extra quiet as you creep back into your parents’ crib. Being a grown, catcalling, creep of a man is hard when you’re living with the ‘rents, but don’t worry, you got this. ?


READ: It’s Time For Men To Step Up And Call Out Their Homies About Sexual Harassment And Assault


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These 15 Photos Track J Balvin’s Hair Evolution From Afro Balvin to Lisa Frank Print And Beyond

Entertainment

These 15 Photos Track J Balvin’s Hair Evolution From Afro Balvin to Lisa Frank Print And Beyond

jbalvin / Instagram

Artists are all about expression and experimentation and that is doubly true if you’re J Balvin. This reggaetonero has taken the world by storm and a huge part of his success is definitely because he’s one artist who’s not afraid to be himself and make a statement, whether it’s through his music or fashion.

The Colombian singer, known for his smash hits such as “Mi Gente,” “Ginza” and “Reggaeton,” has used his platform to flaunt his unique style whether it’s through his music, his fashion and especially his hair.

A natural brunette, Balvin has experimented with all sorts of colors and prints – with some looks more successful than others.

In celebration of his inclusive, positive and unapologetic personality, here’s a look at J Balvin’s hair evolution.

Credit: jbalvin / Instagram

Long before there was J Balvin, there was Afro Balvin.

Even after he broke out on the music scene, J Balvin stuck to his ‘roots’ for quite awhile…

Credit: jbalvin / Instagram

The man knows how to work his natural brunette look. And he looks good doing it.

At one point, he took the brunette look to his short and faded look we all know today.

Credit: jbalvin / Instagram

This is the look that he’s built upon with a whole collection of designs. And why not? It’s such a good base cut.

And we can’t forget this unique rainbow-inspired do…

Credit: jbalvin / Instagram

That he played around with around the release of ‘Machika.’ And perhaps it’s what has inspired his ‘Arcoiris’ tour…

Or this neon-green soccer ball one.

Credit: jbalvin / Instagram

I mean that’s pretty amazing.

And from this shaved look, J Balvin has spawned a lookbook of colors, prints, and patterns.

Credit: jbalvin / Instagram

Like this highlighter yellow. Which I’m not sure how I felt about.

There’s been a burnt orange.

Credit: jbalvin / Instagram

Which really started out as a bright orange after the highlighter color from above.

And he loves a hot pink.

Credit: jbalvin / Instagram

Hot pink pops. Especially a highlighter shade like this first one he went with.

He’s even played around with patterns…

Credit: jbalvin / Instagram

Like when he had this tie-dye look in Paris.

But then went back to a different hot pink.

Credit: jbalvin / Instagram

This hot pink, slightly more faded than the first, is a lot less harsh and IMO looks a hell of a lot better.

Before giving us major Lisa Frank vibes during Coachella.

Credit: jbalvin / Instagram

J Balvin owned Coachella and perhaps it was in some part thanks to this amazing hairstyle.

Then he went blonde…

Credit: jbalvin / Instagram

Which I’m totally feeling on him.

But always a sucker for experimentation…

Credit: jbalvin / Instagram

He switched back to some badass tiger stripes, saying in an Instragram post “Yo soy tigre.” Cute.

At first he had it more like a white Siberian tiger…

Credit: jbalvin / Instagram

But a couple of weeks later it was dyed to a more traditional orange-striped tiger.

And now it looks like he’s letting it all grow out.

Credit: jbalvin / Instagram

What will J Balvin do to his hair next?

As J Balvin Is Taking Over The World, Why Aren’t People Talking About Maluma

Entertainment

As J Balvin Is Taking Over The World, Why Aren’t People Talking About Maluma

jbalvin | maluma / Instagram

So far 2019 has been a breakout year for Colombian megastar, J Balvin.

He is not only one of the hottest acts in Spanish-language music but across the entire music industry.

At Coachella, he delivered one of the most talked about performances in a star-studded lineup and even gave a shout out to classic reggaeton.

Like if J Balvin isn’t a Coachella headliner next year, trust that #BoycottCoachella will be a thing.

He’s been all over US talk shows and he’s announced a North American tour with Lyanno and Eladio Carrion.

His summer tour is going to be one of the highlights of summer. I already know.

And after this weekend, the Colombian made history becoming the first reggaetonero to appear on Saturday Night Live.

The singer performed alongside the likes of DJ Khaled, Meek Mill, SZA, and Lil Wayne.

Performing with a star-studded lineup, J Balvin was there to represent.

Credit: @MBradshaw23 / Twitter

That Saturday Night Live stage was pure party mode and we were totally living for it.

And obviously, he didn’t disappoint us, repping the Latino community by singing in Spanish on the main stage.

Credit: @saulofficial / Twitter

In a country where all too often Latino voices aren’t heard and speaking Spanish can even land you in an ICE detention center, this was everything.

Basically everyone who was watching his performance on SNL.

I know because this was me.

There’s already a growing chorus of J Balvin fans demanding he gets his own set next season.

And we are stanning.

The 34-year-old singer though already has a busy lineup ahead. This summer he’ll become the first Latino artist to headline Lollapalooza in Chicago.

J Balvin is living his best life.

And I am absolutely living for him.

But as a diehard Maluma fan, I have to question why just him?

Credit: maluma / Instagram

Maluma has been pumping out album after album with hit after hit and yet he’s just not getting the attention he deserves.

The two are this year’s best bromance.

They’re both from the city of Medellín and both built their careers up from the likes of Daddy Yankee and Shakira.

And that’s all great, but where is Maluma’s hype?

I mean everyone remembers how he was completely ignored at the Met Gala, right?

Credit: @AlfombraRoja_13 / Twitter

Despite being one of the absolute best-dressed guys there.

And with the release of his new album, “11:11”, history seems to be repeating itself.

Credit: @SantiRios09 / Twitter

This is an abomination. Maluma has morphed from Pretty Boy to Dirty Boy. He’s got collabs with Shakira, Annita, and Madonna. And J Balvin! And he is pure fire.

Even his summer bop with Becky G isn’t getting much love.

Why? How is this even possible?

This isn’t taking away from J Balvin in any way, but Maluma is also the total package and I for one think there is enough room for both reggaeton superstars.

Credit: @xtaniayvette / Twitter

So yea…can we make sure that we all get back to talking about the “Pretty Boy, Dirty Boy” and make sure that Maluma has as epic a year as J Balvin?

I’m hoping that this is just a phase and that 2019 is going to be an epic year for Maluma.

Credit: Maluma / Instagram

Aside from partnering with major brands, he’s also starting to embrace more social messages in his songs and videos.

Plus he’s got his new album out, “11:11” and he’s got collab after collab going down. I mean everything from Fifth Harmony and Shakira to Madonna and Marc Anthony. Most recently he teamed up with Lil Pump and XXXTentacion for “Arms Around You” which gave the superstar his first Top 40 entry and highest-charting hit yet.

READ: J Balvin And Maluma Have The Kind Of Bromance That Will Make Anyone Jealous

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