comedy

Here Are The Inevitable Ups And Downs Of Dieting When You Just Love Food

Nothing is worse than having to force yourself not to eat your favorite foods when you are trying to salvage your waistline. But our culture is so deeply rooted to food that giving up food literally breaks your heart. Here are the stages of trying to give up ropa vieja for bland, basic chicken.

You start by trying to convince yourself that eating fruit will make you feel all clean and sh*t.

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Yes. Go on and tell yourself you’re going to feel *this* good eating fruit.

But all you really want to do is cover your fruit with Tajín or any other high-sodium, flavor-packing super food.

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CREDIT: mitú

Technically this does count as your serving of fruit, doesn’t it?

Like chile. Not being able to add your favorite chile to literally everything is killing you.

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CREDIT: mitú

You can’t even call it food if it doesn’t have chile.

It isn’t long until you start bargaining with yourself that one little dessert won’t make a difference.

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CREDIT: mitú

One cheat meal is supposed to help you stay focused.

But that one cookie starts a chain reaction and you realize you’ve fallen far off the health wagon.

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CREDIT: mitú

Me: “Why do I always do this to myself?!”

You start experimenting with food to fill your stomach any way possible.

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CREDIT: mitú

If you keep repeating to yourself that a banana will taste the same as a tostón, maybe it’ll actually happen.

But nothing causes you to lose it more than when you swap a sugary option for water.

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CREDIT: mitú

Technically, the ice is water and water is good for you so why can’t Slurpees be part of your diet. ?

You start seeing the good in things like guava is good for you, right?

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CREDIT: mitú

It comes from a fruit after all.

But you lose it at your little prima’s birthday party because you realize you can’t go to a family gathering and avoid food.

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CREDIT: mitú

*writes several apology letters*

You reminisce about the times you would eat until your stomach was full and your heart was happy.

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CREDIT: mitú

? If I could turn back time/If I could find a way… ?

So you say, “screw it, diets are for quitters” and you remember who you’ve always been.

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CREDIT: mitú

A flawless, badass Latinx with a healthy appetite.


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READ: And This Is Why Dieting Is Physically And Mentally Impossible For Us

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The ‘How It Started’ Memes Are Filled With The Funny And Wholesome Content We All Need In 2020

Culture

The ‘How It Started’ Memes Are Filled With The Funny And Wholesome Content We All Need In 2020

@xolei3 / Twitter

It is not a lie to say that 2020 has been a year of disappointment and high-stress scenarios. We’ve had to quarantine from a virus, wildfires are destroying a lot of land, and well, everything else going on has just made things worse. Fortunately, on Twitter trend is giving everyone a chance to see that things can get better.

Let’s face it, 2020 has been a tough year for everyone but one Twitter trend is making life a little better.

We’ve all seen the “How It Started” memes taking over social media in recent weeks. The memes are both funny and inspirational with some showing some amazing glow ups and others showing the crushing reality of everyday life. We have all felt like the man crying over 2020 at some point over the last 7 months. It’s like this year just doesn’t stop.

Relationships are a big part of this meme trend.

Oof. This is painful and so many of us know this to be true. 😭 Sure, we can all blame our relationship woes on the current state of the world. However, that would just be doing a disservice to ourselves and our love lives. Most of us who are single now have been single for a very long time pre-Covid. But, hey, no one knows that you’re lying if you blame Covid.

A few wonderful people highlighted their transition into their true selves.

Stunning. Show-stopping. Magnificent. We love to see it. There is nothing better to see in this world than someone living their authentic truth. Like, go and do your thing. Slay all of the hearts you see, honey, and take no prisoners. We are all better in their world to be surrounded by people living in complete honesty.

The Lil Nas X joined in on the fun and highlighted his own meteoric rise to fame.

The “Old Town Road” singer really did make a big name for himself. Not only did his song get made into a duet and remix with every artist imaginable, he beat Mariah Carey’s record. Lil Nas X went from someone that no one knew to unseating Mariah Carey for longest time spent at No. 1 on the Billboard Charts.

There are some very clever takes on this meme.

So, like, who else feels like they are being personally attacked by this meme? College might have been years ago but these memories linger. Tequila is just one of those things that so many of use have to learn the hard way and those lessons stick with you.

Simone Biles gave us one of the most memorable glow ups of the meme challenge.

Simone Biles is one of the most legendary women to ever walk this planet. The way she was able to make herself known around the world as the best gymnast is no short feat. She is and will always be one of the best women to represent the U.S. in the Olympics.

READ: President Trump Thinks Injecting Disinfectants Could Cure COVID-19 And The Memes Are Hilarious

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Mountain Dew Margaritas Are Apparently A Thing At Red Lobster Now?

Culture

Mountain Dew Margaritas Are Apparently A Thing At Red Lobster Now?

Matt Winkelmeyer / Getty

We’ve seen all kinds of takes on the timeless classic that is a Margarita. From frozen Margaritas to ones with cranberry juice and dashes of blue curaçao and twists of basil and ginger beer we’ve literally seen it all. Or so we thought.

Recently, Red Lobster announced that they’re doing a Mountain Dew-take on the beloved and salty tequila cocktail.

Red Lobster’s DEW-Garita promises to set you aglow.

The drink is the first official Mountain Dew cocktail and of course, it is bright lime green. While the cocktail’s recipe is being kept strictly under wraps, like everything at Red Lobster’s, it’s supposed to pair “perfectly” with Red Lobster’s iconic Cheddar Bay Biscuits.

“Red Lobster is thrilled to work with PepsiCo, not only because it has a great portfolio of brands, but specifically because of the food and beverage innovation possibilities,” Nelson Griffin,the Senior Vice President and Chief Supply Chain Officer at Red Lobster said in a statement about the drink.

Red Lobster’s DEW-Garita is due to debut at Red Lobster locations nationwide in September and by the end of 2020.

The Margarita is an iconic Mexican drink related to a drink called Rhe Daisy.

The classic Tequila sour cocktail is one of the most beloved cocktails in the world. According to Wine Enthusiast “One story claims that the drink was created in 1938, as Mexican restaurant owner Carlos (Danny) Herrera mixed it for gorgeous Ziegfeld showgirl Marjorie King. Supposedly, Tequila was the only alcohol that King would abide, so Herrera added lime juice and salt.”

To make your own classic Margarita check out this recipe below

Ingredients

  • Coarse salt
  • Lime wedge
  • 2 ounces white Tequila
  • 1 ounce orange liqueur
  • 1 ounce lime juice

Directions

Shake out coarse salt on a plate. Wet the rim of a glass by using the lime wedge. Press the rim of the glass in the plate of salt to coat. Add ice to the glass.

Fill a cocktail shaker with ice and add the rest of the ingredients. Shake well, and pour into the prepared glass over ice.

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