bad hombres

This Mexican Dude Is The First Person To Ever Beat Every Nintendo Video Game

Piotr Delgado Kusielczuk / Facebook

Bleeding Cool reports that Piotr Delgado Kusielczuk, or as he’s known on Twitch, The Mexican Runner has “set the bar for every old-school NES collector and gamer.” Delgado Kusielczuk has beat every game ever put out for the Nintendo Entertainment System. All 714 games. The best part? He recorded video footage of ALL OF IT.

Here’s how Piotr Delgado Kusielczuk was dubbed The Mexican Runner

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@TheMexicanRuner / Twitter

According to Unocero, The Mexican Runner “bears that name because he started doing streams of speedruns (sessions to finish the games as fast as possible) in a small community that is dedicated to this field of video games.” Finish as quickly as possible?

It all started as a joke when a friend told him  he should give it a try…

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When his friend told him he should try to beat every Nintendo game, he had to think about it for a second. But, then decided to take on that monster-of-a-challenge like the champion he is. Kusielczuk! Kusielczuk! Kusielczuk!

But, then he actually did it — this dude beat every single NES game!

CleverUsername42 / YouTube

He crushed all 714 games. To give you an idea of how hard that is, try to remember if you’ve ever even beaten any NES game in your whole miserable life. You haven’t. Now, imagine how hard it would be if you did, and then multiply that by 714. What? Anyway, Bleeding Cool says “This is a feat that no other mass collector on the planet can actively claim with legitimacy, not even well-known NES enthusiasts like James Rolfe (AVGN) or Pat Contri (The NES Punk).”

He didn’t cheat or even use Game Genie

Chris J / YouTube

Kusielczuk beat every one of the 8-bit games in his NES library and he did it without using a single code — other than the code of honor that he lives by, which prohibits this player from living anyway except for straight up.

What’s next for “The Mexican Runner?”

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Piotr Delgado Kusielczuk / Facebook

I’m gonna see if he wants to help me take on that impossible underwater level from “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles” for NES. Then, we’ll probably go get froyo like a couple of bros, or maybe my new best friend will come up with something more badass for us to do. He’s pretty chill.

Check out his Twitch broadcast to witness this life-unlocking achievement for yourself:

[H/T] Bleeding Cool: “The Mexican Runner” Conquers The Entire NES Library
[H/T] Unocero: Mexicano se convierte en la primera persona en terminar todos los juegos de NES

READ: Seriously, Here’s Why You Should Stop Rubbing One Out Right Now!

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A New Spider Was Discovered In Baja California After Biting Someone, And It's Bigger Than A Softball

bad hombres

A New Spider Was Discovered In Baja California After Biting Someone, And It’s Bigger Than A Softball

TheCrypticCinema / YouTube

When was the last time you had a nightmare that continued to frighten you long after you’d already woken up in a terrified sweat? If it’s been years, that streak ends now. According to Gizmodo, in an article they filed under “Kill It With Fire,” a new species of spider has been discovered that’s the size of a softball and guaranteed to give nightmares.

Meet the Califorctenus Cacachilensis, a newly discovered spider that is so gruesome the devil uses its named as his safe word.

Tarantula / Universal Pictures

This new species of arachnid gets its name and classification from the remote mountain region of Baja California Sur, Mexico where researchers from the San Diego Natural History Museum found it in a cave. This hairy spider is four inches of bad dream-inspiring terror. So, just to recap, it lives in caves and is the same size as a Rawlings Dream Seam. (TBH, I’d rather get hit with a pitch than come face to face with this guy.)

This 8-legged freak is unlike the thousands of other documented species of arachnids.

Arachnophobia / Amblin Entertainment

Although it’s actually classified in the same group as the super venomous, Brazilian wandering spider, the Califorctenus Cacachilensis isn’t as dangerous. According to the San Diego Tribune, one of the researchers who found the first live specimen was actually bit, but ended up being totally fine a just few hours later.

But its role in the spider-led extinction of all mankind is just as important.

Eight Legged Freaks / Warner Bros.

Gizmodo reported on a study that claimed spiders, worldwide, are responsible for collectively consuming around 800 million metric tons of food every year — that’s about as much as the combined weight estimate for all humans on Earth. So, there it is. When spiders decide to wipe us off the earth, they won’t even get fat doing it because, apparently, they’ve already been training for it.

[H/T] Gizmodo: This New Mexican Cave Spider is Ridiculous 

READ: Here’s A List Of Things That Take Away Your Manhood

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